I am now a nut cracker, and other odd things I want to share…..

Posted on by Renee

Not really a nut cracker but definitely a knuckle cracker. I never like cracking knuckles. Creeped me out when others did it. I would never do it. I always heard it was bad for your joints. Now suddenly I catch myself cracking them at least five times a day!

Decided that part of the reason I can’t get out of bed in the morning is because with my heated sheet it is so warm and I don’t want to get out into the cold room. So last night I decided to not turn it on. I won’t make that mistake again! I had double yes, DOUBLE charlie cramps in my legs. I can still feel them hurting.

I have to renew my license this year. First tie since I have moved here. I would like to think I have changed physically but the number on the scale says differently.

I think cancer has taken my humor. I can’t seem to find it anywhere. I used to be somewhat funny. Smart funny at times even. Now I struggle to smile at anything I say.

I have only logged twice in the last month! How am I going to finish the big race that is one month! I have no idea .

I think it is odd that I get all of 50 in 50 Marathon (James) blogs emailed to me but his wife Paula at Never a Dull Bling (first blog I followed) doesn’t. I get Shameful Sheep but not Runner Girl or Diane’s Lady who reviews lunches. Why is that? I subscribe to the all the blogs the same way. Technology baffles this old body.

There are stressful things going on in my personal life that I feel I have no input in. In turn it is causing me to hot flash. I take meds to fight the hot flashes but the stress and anxiety always  wins.

I found bird poop on my car that looks like the mother mary. Even the birds are Jesuits in this city.

I want to tiptoe in the tulips this weekend but I am afraid it will only be green stems. No matter I am going on a road trip and I like it! Skagit Valley pictures to follow. That is if I ever take the time to really blog again.

OVERWHELMED!! that is a good word for my brain right now.

Okay that is enough venting to strangers.

 

 

 

147.8 Did I hit some goals this year?…..

Posted on by Renee

I was all excited because I decided to measure my things. Why would that make me excited? Well, when I was looking at my ‘vision board’ (I prefer to call it my goal board) I saw “slimmer thighs” with numbers next to the R and the L. I measured and I hit those goals!!!! WOOT!! Then I realized those were my STARTING numbers! wah!  I didn’t lose and inch or half-inch or even one-quarter inch. Does that discourage me? Well maybe a little. In fact at first it discouraged me a lot. Not only did I not hit my thing goals, I looked around and realized I didn’t hit ANY of my goals. That is very discouraging.

As I started looking closer it dawned on me; I may not have hit them but I am a LOT closer to them. I will just have to keep working at them.

On the plus side today I did PASS my 2B Mindset Mentor certification!!! Can I get a ‘way to go’? This goes tight along with the mindset that I am trying to change in my life. Finding the balance between healthy and happy. It is something I am working on myself about. If I can live it in MY life it will be easier to help others make it happen in theirs. That is what health coaching is all about. Helping each other.

With that said I am still filling out my tracker on a daily basis. Do I have this down yet? Absolutely not! Will I get it? Yes, I will! It is the holiday AND my son is coming home at midnight tonight. We are not doing a lot of presents but we will be doing a lot of good food. Creating those happy memories through the smells and tastes. I started early 😉

Breakfast: coffee with almond milk creamer; three cups. Cafe latte super foods shake with spinach, blueberries, almond butter, cinnamon and turmeric.

Cleaned the kitchen and baked the banana apple muffins the hubby loves. Had a small cutie orange and a bite of an apple.

Lunch was the remainder slices of pizza. They are large New York style thin pizza slices with sausage, mushrooms and black olives. One cup of salad greens with some cucumber, black olives, red onions and tomatoes. Diluted balsamic dressing, two tablespoonfuls. One Ghirardelli dark chocolate 60% cacao. Four mini non-parliels.

Dinner is two cheese crisps baked in the oven. I didn’t really measure the cheese. I guess you could call it two handfuls. Ate the remainder of the salad. Had a One Tree Cider Lemon Basil. It is 22 ounces. Four of the small homemade chocolate chip cookies made by my friend.

150 ounces of water. Yoga stretch today along with filming five videos for my Cancercize YouTube page.

I know it isn’t perfect but I am very happy with today.

146.0 Saturday….

Posted on by Renee

It was so weird having Friday off that I honestly lost track of what day it is today. Thankfully hubby is constantly reminding me. :/

Not much to report today. Did a new workout online with friends. I really did not want to but I was being held accountable to it.     So I will just spell out my food for you today:

Coffee creamer; four cups total throughout the day.  Breakfast was two slices of toast with spreadable butter, two scrambled eggs (in olive oil) with cheddar cheese.

Did my intense step workout twenty-five minutes total. Had a chocolate recovery drink afterwards and a small cutie.

Watched a couple of Christmas movies and had snacks for a very late lunch. Snacks were two single servings of Smartfood White Cheddar cheese popcorn, one cheese horn pastry and the last five single packets of those Welch’s fruit snack packs.

Had a late dinner with the hubby tonight. We ordered in. Had pizza. I had two slices of pizza with sausage, mushrooms and black olives. Also had 2 cups of veggie salad with balsamic dressing. two of Tam’s chocolate cookies.

The workout was intense. I am going to be sore tomorrow for sure. At least I was good about my water: 150 ounces.

How did you do?

148.6 Friday…

Posted on by Renee

The scale showed me how poorly I ate at the goody day at work… TOO MUCH JUNK YESTERDAY!!

Tried to sleep in today since I actually had the day off. I made it all the way to 6:20 AM. WOOT!!  Well it is a start.

Got up and had a couple of cups (3) of coffee with creamer and watched a Christmas movie on Netflix.  Made my super foods shake. Tried a holiday recipe It was called chili mocha. It was really good!

Lunch was a grilled cheese sandwich with two cups of salad and greek dressing. Two fo the Welch’s fruit snacks packs and two of the small chocolate chip cookies my girlfriend shipped me.  Ran some errands and stopped at Starbucks for a small chestnut praline latte. It was pretty good.

Got home and had two servings of the Smartfood white cheddar popcorn.

Dinner tonight was spent in my room, in my bed eating the reaming humus (half a container) and about two cups of pita chips.

Yeah, it wasn’t pretty but I was sulking. Mad at the hubby and feeling sorry for myself. Bleh not how I wanted to spend my first day off since June. My own fault for letting things get to me.

Yoga relax tonight.  125 ounces of water today.

 

how did you do?

 

147..It’s my Friday!!

Posted on by Renee

It was goody day at work today. At one point I just wrote down in my tracker “grazing” I am just going to post the picture of my tracker. It is too much to actually re-type for the blog…

berg. At least it is my Friday. Ginger spice cookies were a hit.

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Change the bag of Welches Fruit snacks to three and I finished off the last 25 ounces water rounding it out to 150 ounces for the day. I did do my Yoga stretch this morning and that is ONE positive thing. I also had my healthy super foods shake so that is TWO healthy positive things.

 

How did you do?

144.8 Wednesday …..

Posted on by Renee

Everyone is doing the best he can…..That was the lesson from my personal development today. Everyone is doing the best he can. Even if it doesn’t appear that way they really are.  Good words to learn to live by. If only I could figure that out.

Today was my blood draws and infusion. I am so happy that day is over!! I am actually feeling very relieved and I fully believe I will be able to sleep tonight. Thankful the hubby he came with me this time. It helped me be more talkative and distracted. I always cry a little when they try to get the iv in. I still shed a few tears but much less this time. I told him that I wanted him to take a picture of me. I wanted to do the “Jill Whelan” face from the movie “Airplane”

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That is as good as I could do. If you are going to be miserable you may as well find a way to make it fun, right?

Blood work came back good. I still have osteopenia and there is change in my spine but not enough to have to change my meds. So all in all it was a good week. I think my lipids are not lower so I am sure my PCP will be calling me soon about that. Bleh. Oh well one thing at a time.

I had to fast for my appointment so my whole day of food is off. Very off. This is how it played out:

Plain coffee (fasting) Get to work around 11:15AM go and get an almond butter Protein Puck. It was stale and I couldn’t chew it. I managed to get about 1/2 of it down. I really wanted an espresso but hubby drove me and so I didn’t have the car. I settled for coffee with almond milk. Wasn’t that good. Someone offered me a chocolate truffle and I ate that. it was good.

Lunch rolled around and it was kale and cabbage salad with green olives and feta dressing. I added tomatoes too. Had one cup of bake pasta. Shared some of Scott’s chips and salsa again.

After lunch I had another cup of coffee. This time with almond milk and sugar. Yes sugar.

Got home after work and had to bake the cookies pictured above. Ginger spice. Made them spicier this time, more ginger and allspice. Hubby said they were spicier.

Anyway while baking I made dinner. Two cheese crisps, 2 Angry Orchard hard ciders, 10 nonpareil chocolates and two ginger spice cookies. No wonder my cholesterol isn’t getting better :/

The GOOD things I did today was YOGA with my friend Ginny and 150 ounces of water. That makes me happy. That and infusion is done!

How did you do?

145.8 Tuesday:What is wrong with me…

Posted on by Renee

Give your best regardless of who is watching. That is what I read today in my personal development. I am being as honest as I can on this blog on what I eat and it is definitely not ‘my best’ Bleh. Here it is in it’s full glory.

Coffee w/creamer (almond milk) 2

Vanilla super foods shake with spinach, almond butter and blueberries.

Work coffee with almond milk, two.

1 and 1/2 ounces of chocolate covered almonds.

Lunch: kale salad with poppy seed dressing and four little tomatoes. 1 cup of pasta from last night. Giant pretzel with cheese dip. Five large Fritos with salsa #thanksscott

One cup of decaf coffee with almond milk.

Get home. I have the CHOICE to eat healthy OR stuff my face since I have to fast for blood work and my infusion tomorrow. I opt for stuffing my face.

This is how dinner played out: Smartfood white cheddar popcorn; one serving. Two cheese crisps. One Angry Orchard hard cider. Two Welches fruit snacks.

WHAT.IS.WRONG.WITH.ME?

My excuses have been the stress and anxiety of my upcoming appointment tomorrow. So the question lies; will I stop eating like this AFTER the weigh in and blood work and infusion tomorrow? I guess we will know soon enough.

I did get my yoga in today and 150 ounces of water.

Monday. Dexa scan 146.8….

Posted on by Renee

Had my dexa scan today, maybe deca scan.. It is a bone density test. It is one of the easiest appointments I could possibly ever have on this cancer journey of mine. No calcium 24 hours prior and no metal, buckles, or zippers. I wore my workout pants and my wireless bra. Turns out I still had to take my bra off since it had metal hooks. I did put on my work shoes and long socks so I looked quite hilarious in the waiting room. Black knee-length workout pants and socks with cups of coffee on them! Oh well. Made the appointment go easier. I had to turn my left foot in and then the technician strapped my foot in place. It was just funny when she asked me to turn the foot in then explained that she would “secure” it in place. No matter, it went smoothly and hopefully when I see the oncologist  on Wednesday it will have good results.

I am super stressed out about the Wednesday appointment. I know it is what is driving me to eat too much and hot flash too much and not sleep well. Bleh..

This is how my food played out for the day along with emotions too:

Coffee with unsweetened vanilla almond milk; two cups. Chocolate super foods shake with spinach, blueberries and almond butter.

After my appointment I get to work later than usual (duh) and make a cup of coffee with the last of the maple almond milk creamer. Then one cup with almond milk.

Lunch was kale/cabbage salad, one and half cups with pumpkin seeds and dried cranberries, 1 tablespoonful. Had four cherry tomatoes and poppy seed dressing too. The dressing was about 2 tablespoonful and a splash of water to thin it out.

Ate humus and pita chips too. Love the salt. I find it very comforting.

After lunch I enjoyed one of those Lindt chocolate truffles. I really wanted an Almond Joy but we were out of stock. Really hoping after Wednesday I will have less bad cravings and less hot flashes.

Got home and the popcorn the hubby had ordered from Amazon came in. He shared a bag with me. Smartfood White Cheddar popcorn. It was very good! I may have to snag another bag from him tomorrow.

I opened a bottle of Angry Orchard Knotty Pear and started making dinner. Dinner took a long time so I opened another bottle.

I made more of the baked pasta for dinner tonight. This time I used butternut squash instead of carrots in the sauce. It is strictly because I was out of carrot puree so I had to improvise. I still had a bag of cauliflower puree in the freezer so I had that in there too. I steamed a cup of broccoli to accompany my pasta. (pictured above)

So I am counting that as two servings of veggies. That means I had three and half servings of veggies today. At least that is how I am logging it.

Water is at 125 ounces and I did a yoga practice today too.

How did you do?

 

145.0 Sunday..

Posted on by Renee

Lot’s of errands done today. A little yoga and not a whole lot else done today.

Coffee with almond milk creamer, three cups. Super foods cafe latte almond butter with banana

Lunch was a champengo burrito. Yum! (flour tortilla, cactus, beef, rice, refried beans, onions and salsa)

Coffee with more creamer (need to stay awake today, so much to do)

Ran to the grocery store for food. Got home and was tired. Coffee didn’t work. Had an Angry Orchard Knotty Pear cider and took a nap.

Dinner tonight was two hot dogs with cheese. Hubby made them.

Calling it a day.

Water was 125 ounces.

How did you do?

144.6 Saturday.

Posted on by Renee

Not much to chat about today. Mom texted me first thing this morning. She forgot we are an hour behind her now. Six months out of the year we are on the same time. I really do miss that about AZ. NO changing of the time.

Did a Yoga core workout THEN did a 20 minute high intensity workout right after. I had a tremendous amount of energy up until about 5PM then I crashed. I will see how I feel tomorrow for sure. I was however really hungry after that. I did not eat as many veggies as I should have today. It played out like this:

Coffee and creamer three cups. Super foods shake, vanilla and banana with almond butter.

After the workouts hubby and I went out for a late breakfast. It was about 1PM. Went to the local favorite Kalico Kitchen. I ordered the country Benedict. That is an english muffins with butter, two sausage patties two eggs, gravy and hash browns.

After that we went to the local Cash and Carry. One of the things we picked up was a microwave bag of pork rinds. Hubby and I shared the popped bag. They were very salty. He liked them a lot. I would rather have the ones we buy in the bag.

Dinner was also picked up from Cash and Carry. Dinty Moore beef stew. I can’t even tell you how many years it has been since we have had that. I want to say at least six or more. I guess it technically had carrots in it so that is a ‘veggie’.

Water is at 120 ounces today. So to recap: good workout, water not bad, veggies hmm.

 

How did you do?

146.6….Thirsty, tired and hot…..

Posted on by Renee

That is what I woke up to today. I don’t know why I am getting so hot lately. I am generally cold by nature but now with the unnatural hot flashes I am warm. Usually I am more comfortable in the winter time because it all balances out. The hot flashes actually seem to lessen. Not this week. This week I can’t sleep because they are terrorizing me. I toss and turn. I get up and walk around. When my alarm goes off and I hit snooze I lay there in an awful sweat that actually forces me to get up instead of hitting snooze eight more times like I like. Bleh.

Hoping for some reprieve soon. I believe stress induces the hot flashes. When this week is over and the doctor appoints are past I am really hoping to have evidence of that.

Now I am tired and ready for bed and it is only 7:30pm. Good times. Any way this is how my food played out today:

Coffee and almond milk creamer, two cups. Super foods shake was chocolate/spinach/banana

Decided to treat myself to a coffee since the roads were fine and I had an extra 25 minutes before work started. Worked out nice. The special was called the North Pole and it was prailines and creme brûlée’s PLUS I had a free one coming to me. So win-win in my book.

Delena made goodies again. She brought in those giant pretzel sticks dipped in chocolate. I helped myself to one. Very good.

Lunchtime rolled around and I had a cup of broccoli and a cup of the left over baked penne from the other night. You know, the one with carrots and cauliflower hidden it. We are almost out of the cauliflower puree and the hubby sent me an article stating there is a recall on that veggie now. Oh no!!

Got home from work and wasn’t sure what we would do for dinner. After searching the fridge and cabinets we settled on grilled cheese sandwiches. Hubby and I each had TWO!  So that means four slices of bread, four slices of cheese and a tablespoon of butter. It was very good. Nothing redeeming about it except it was the good Dave’s Killer Bread with the perfect balance of fiber and carbs.

While rifling through the cabinets I came across the bag of Hickory Farms mini nonpareil and had a serving of them for my dessert. I included a nice cup of black decaf coffee to wash them down with.

Thirty minutes of Yoga Relax today and am at 125 ounces of water. Not the best day, but not my worst. I had several servings of veggies and that is good.

How did you do?